I might become an alcoholic or shoot myself

Okay, so the first two weeks of Pancake's life were definitely a honeymoon period before the real shit hit our lives. My children are simultaneously the reason I want to shoot myself and the reason to live. Baby Doodle has turned into a non-behaving, annoying, manipulative little shit. The last two days have been the worst. It's so ridiculous to live this way it's comical. Baby Doodle is not only refusing to nap, he's refusing to stay in his room so Mr. D and I can have a brief part of our day without playing some game or listening to whining about how we won't play some game with our three year old. Now I have to buy a lock for BD's bedroom because he won't stay in it. I put up the gate and he figured out how to use his trash can as a step stool to climb over it. I took away all five of his bats so he couldn't play baseball. I took away two of his favorite engines (Murdoch and Gordon) for two days. No effect at all. When I tell him to do something it's as if I'm not even speaking. I'm frustrated and tired and annoyed all day long. We didn't go to story time on Tuesday because of his stubbornness. We were late to gym class on Wednesday for the same reason. We didn't leave the house today even thought Mr. D and I thought it would be fun to bring BD to Smith Playground -- you can guess why. Tomorrow we're going to bring BD to the Toy Train Museum in Strasburg, PA. I hope we make it there. Now add to all this a screaming infant in your ear for 40% of the day and you've got the makings of an alcoholic mother. I'm on my third glass of wine for the night. Let me pause here to take a sip.

Now, before you feel sympathetic, if you have the inclination to feel that way, let me remind you that Mr. D is home with us. I'm not even doing this on my own and I still can barely handle it. What on earth am I going to do when Mr. D goes back to work, which isn't until after Memorial Day, but still, it's looming on the horizon like a big dead end, like the end of my existence. I long for the late evenings when both children are sleeping and I can close my eyes and not here anything. No nagging, no asking, no whining, no screaming in my ear, no crying, no potty training. Oh the hours between 11pm and 3am are wonderful.

potty time

Baby Doodle, who is clearly not a baby any more, used the potty all day today, with one exception. Since it was an abnormally hot day today Mr. Doodlebug dragged the kiddie pool and hose out of the basement and set them up in the back yard. BD was wearing his bathing suit without a diaper and knew that he shouldn't pee or poop in his suit. We put the potty right next to the pool and reminded him to tell us when he had to go. I went to the grocery store with Pancake and when I came home BD had peed in the potty. I was thrilled and seeing my excitement and pride for him he decided he wanted to go again. When he did I asked if he wanted a mini marshmallow for his achievement (a reward I had already told him about many times over the past few months). I put his Thomas underpants on for inside play before lunch. After the first two marshmallows he kept going in the potty. He peed about 10 times before his nap. I was surprised his little body could keep producing pee like that. But after every time he got his reward. Then he pooped in the potty. We put a diaper on him for his nap and before he actually fell asleep he pooped in the diaper, which he felt bad about when he woke up.

We're on our way!!!

Baby Doodle's doctor appointment

I never gave BD a proper three-year old post and after being at the doctor's office yesterday I realize how much he knows and great he is. The benchmarks that BD should be meeting at three are things he's known and has been able to do since he was two -- identifying colors, shapes, drawing a circle, jumping up and down with both feet.

I had him spell his name and make a few letters with a crayon for his doctor to demonstrate his skills. This was the first appointment that his blood pressure was taken and a vision test was given. He had to stand pretty far away from a chart with pictures on it and identify the pictures at different sizes, first with both eyes then with me holding my hand over his right eye then his left. He did great and has 20/20 vision. The doctor said few three year olds have the patience and attention span for the entire vision test and she seemed impressed that he could do the whole thing without complaining or becoming distracted. I guess my fears that he would have autism seem downright ridiculous now.

Baby Doodle is such a great kid. He has exceeded our expetations as a big brother and is an extraordinary kid, of course I'm biased, but I'm just so proud of him. I love him so much. It's true what people say, I really do have enough love for both of my kids, and my husband to boot.

Thank you!

Thank you to Mr. Doodlebug's employer for so generously giving him 12 weeks of paid paternity leave. Thank you Mr. D for using these first six weeks (it's been three since Pancake was born) to be really useful -- the highest praise you can give one of Sir Topham Hatt's engines. Not only does Mr. D take care of baby Doodle's every need and desire, he takes Pancake and keeps her quiet while I sleep in in the morning or nap in the afternoon or just to cuddle with her. Yesterday BD had his three year doctor appointment (more on this in the next post). I took BD and Mr. D stayed home with Pancake. When we came home Mr. D had done all the dishes and mopped the kitchen floor while carrying Pancake in the Ergo carrier. Way to not just be with our daughter, but actually do housework, too. I was impressed. Mr. has enthusiastically made me lunches, cleaned and straightened our house, especially the kitchen, kept our children quiet while I rested and been an enormous help to me and to BD. So, thank you Mr. D for your devotion to our family.

pictures of Pancake

It's a girl!

We'll call her Pancake for the purposes of this blog. Pancake is the name baby Doodle gave her when I was pregnant. She was born yesterday, March 31st at 5:31 p.m. She weighed in at 7 pounds and is 18.5 inches long. She has a perfect little head and is cute as can be. Baby Doodle and some of the family were at the hospital today to meet Pancake. Baby Doodle was quite taken with her and wanted to "help" me with every little thing I had to do for her, including nursing her. We also sang happy birthday to him three times while he was here, had cupcakes and gave him his presents (Henry, the engine, Phillies tickets and a World Champion penant, and a giant number puzzle).

It's a shame that I have to be in the hospital on baby Doodle's third birthday. At least we spent the afternoon together and already had his birthday party. I promised him a basketball cake when I get home, tomorrow.

Pictures will be forthcoming.