disciplining

Today I had to discipline baby Doodle, not once but twice. And I don't mean the kind of discipline where I say "no no" when he's about to touch something I don't want him to touch. I mean the kind of discipline where I have to . . . well, I'll just tell you what happened.

We were at the table about to eat lunch. I had reheated some left over vegetable lasagna that a friend made and was kind enough to let me take baby Doodle's left overs with us. I had been preparing baby Doodle to eat lasagna in the car on the way home from story hour, "we're going to have lasagna for lunch when we get home." And "it's so delicious. Mmm I love lasagna." Baby Doodle was repeating "lasana lasana." We get home. I heat it, then cool it. It's ready to eat. I put some on baby Doodle's fork. He says, "no no no, cheese." I say he has to have some lasagna first, since I know he likes it and he had a ton of cheese last night causing some very hard poop. He pushes the fork away and repeats his mantra, "no no no." I take a few enthusiastic bites to prove how good it is. Still nothing. Then baby Doodle picks up his water cup and throws it on the ground. I sternly tell him, "No. Do not throw your cup on the floor." Then I put it out of his reach. I continue eating my lunch. Then baby Doodle picks up his plate of perfectly good lasagna and throws it on the floor splattering sauce and vegetables everywhere. I gave him a stern look and said, "No. Do not throw your plate or your food on the floor. You can throw balls, not food." I cleaned the floor, dished out some more lasagna and offered it again. He put it in his mouth then spit it back out. I ignored him. He requested cheese. I repeated he could have a piece of cheese after each bite of lasagna. I offered the lasagna again. This time he ate it, and liked it, then I gave him the promised cheese. We continued this way with him saying proudly, "lasana, then cheese, lasana, then cheese" until the lasagna was almost gone. It was a battle I didn't want to have to have, but I felt like we had a breakthrough. I held my ground. Did not tolerate him acting like a brat, and he did what I wanted and ended up liking it, as I knew he would.

He took a nearly three hour nap. We went to the playground, came home, and read some stories. Mr. Doodlebug came home and we had dinner. I made tortilla pizzas, asparagus and beet greens -- I know they don't all go together but it's what I had on hand. For baby Doodle I had available pizza, asparagus, yogurt, pasta, mashed sweet potatoes, and more of that dreaded lasagna. He gladly ate the yogurt and a few bites of pizza. Then he decided to test his limits again. For no apparent reason he threw his milk on the floor. I gave him the stern look he's now accustomed to and said, "No. Do not throw your milk on the floor." He laughed and looked at Mr. Doodlebug who said, "That's right baby Doodle. Do not throw your milk on the floor."

He proceeded to pick up his fork and chuck it at me. It landed right in front of me on the table. You can guess what I said here. Then, he threw his water on the floor breaking the seal the rubber top makes with the hard plastic bottom. Without saying a word I removed his tray from the booster seat, unbuckled him and carried him up to his room. I sat on the rocking chair holding him facing me. I said, "Look at Mommy. You can not throw your things. You can't throw your water or your milk or your fork or spoon. Do not throw your plate or bowl. The only thing you are allowed to throw is your ball. You have to listen to Mommy." He tried to smile a few times but when he saw I wasn't amused he straightened his face. I gave him a hug and a kiss and reminded him how much I love him. I brought him back downstairs and sat him back in his seat. He told Mr. Doodlebug that he can't throw his -- then he listed everything he can't throw. He neatly and obediently ate his sweet potatoes. He made conversation with us, mostly about not throwing things. Dinner was over and Mr. Doodlebug took him upstairs for his bath. I did the dishes and thought about how tired I am.

I am drained from my two power struggles with my 19-month old. I hope I sent the right messages today. I hope I got through to baby Doodle that I am in charge and that he has to listen to me. I hope I also relayed that I still love him even when I'm mad. I hope what I'm doing will make him behave and be respectful, not because he's afraid not to be but because it's the right thing to do.

An update on my life

Thanksgiving was good. We went to the parade in Center City in the morning with friends of ours. We took the train in, which worked out great.

For dinner we went to family friends of Mr. Doodlebug's house and met his parents there. I overstuffed myself as I always do on holidays. Baby Doodle had a ball playing with his grandparents and the dog that was visiting.

Friday, we braved what we thought would be huge crowds and went shopping. There weren't that many people out. I bought a pair of jeans at Old Navy for $15, Christmas pajamas for baby Doodle, and a birthday present for a friend. We perused flat screen TVs at Best Buy but didn't buy any.

Saturday, we went back to Best Buy and bought a Magnavox (which is now owned by Philips)26-inch flat screen TV. Since we don't have HDTV cable the picture isn't any better than our 19-inch 25-year old television. We're looking into HDTV. It's a really nice TV and we're happy with it. Hooking it up was super easy. Oh yea, the TV has a built-in DVD player so we moved our other DVD player up to our bedroom. We're moving our antiquated 19-incher to the guest room. The new TV is our Christmas gift to ourselves so we can check that off the list now.

Sunday, I spent the entire morning vacuuming every rug in our house. We have a runner rug on our first floor stairs that hadn't been cleaned in a while. Then I went grocery shopping by myself -- luxury -- while baby Doodle and Mr. Doodlebug played at the playground. The park was covered with leaves making it a lot of fun!

Today is Monday and it's back to the old routine. We went to the zoo this morning even though it's cold and wet outside. We went to all the indoor stuff we skipped this summer. Baby Doodle now says "lemur" and "crocodile."

I love this time of year. I feel like we always have social plans and Mr. Doodlebug has more time off from work than usual. I love it when he's home.

Another trip to Vermont

Baby Doodle and I got back from Vermont yesterday after spending a week away. We took Amtrak from Philly to Greenfield, MA where my aunt met us at the train station and drove us to her house. The train ride was great. Baby Doodle loved it. He walked up and down the aisles greeting his fellow passengers with a smile and "Hi." Everyone was sweet and smiled or made conversation with him. He even napped for 45 minutes in his car seat.

We spent one night at my aunt's house and then met my mother the next day. She drove us to her house where we hung out for a few hours then went to a Rutland County Democratic fundraiser where Vermont's congressman, Peter Welch, spoke. Baby Doodle thought it was great fun to clap with the crowd. At the end of our large, fatty meal we shared a gigantic piece of apple pie. Now if you remind baby Doodle about the pie he says, "pie, people, clap, Welch." It's really cute.

Monday afternoon baby Doodle got his first real hair cut. The woman who used to cut my hair, still cuts my mom's and did my hair for my wedding cut baby Doodle's. Coincidentally, her son is two months younger than BD and has the same name. We went to an old high school friend's house for dinner on Monday night. She has two kids the younger of whom I hadn't met. They have a great play room in their basement with all kinds of toys that couldn't fit in our house, at least not nicely, like a soccer goal and plastic basketball hoop. Baby Doodle was in heaven.

We went to my old high school where my mother works so she could show him off to her friends. They were appropriately impressed with his cuteness and vocabulary. One day, baby Doodle got to feed a horse grass when we dropped off one of my mom's students at her house. Now when you ask him about the horse he says, "horse, grass, pet, eye." He fed the horse grass, then pet the horse's mane and looked into his huge eye. He didn't actually pet his eye.

We went up to Burlington, VT to see my brother, his girlfriend and the house they recently bought. My brother was quite late meeting us so we got the tour of the house from his girlfriend then went to the restaurant where he met us. I had a delicious microbrew they made there. I've been drinking wine for so long I forgot what it is like to enjoy a good Vermont beer. My ex-boyfriend who was supposed to meet us at the restaurant didn't get there until after 8:00 when we were in the car half way to Rutland (where my mother lives). I was really disappointed, but not that surprised.

My brother drove down to my mother's house the next night, arriving a little before 7:00, to have dinner with us and make up for the fact that we barely got to see him the night before. It was great to hang out with him for a while and make fun of my mother -- just like old times.

Baby Doodle and I boarded the train in Rutland to head home. It was snowing -- the only snow we saw all week. A very nice guy who got on in Rutland helped me figure out what I was doing wrong with the wheels that attach to BD's car seat. When we arrived in New York we had to switch trains with an hour and a half between them. Another really nice guy carried one of my bags up two flights of stairs, along with his own bag, to help me out. A third nice gentleman helped me get baby Doodle's car seat with a huge bag strapped to it onto the train in NY. And yet another guy carried one of my bags up the escalator at 30th Street Station here in Philly. The generosity and kindness of the people I encountered during this trip was fabulous. People are so nice. And I have to say, I experienced the exact opposite when I flew to San Francisco alone with baby Doodle. We had a pleasant train trip in both directions.

Riding the police car at the playground in Rutland. My mother gave him the sunglasses which he loved and actually kept them on his head.

Getting his first hair cut. He looks like a big kid now -- it's kind of sad. You'll have to wait for the Christmas card to see the result.

Josh Ritter

On Wednesday, Mr. Doodlebug and I went to see Josh Ritter play at the World Cafe Live. I've been a fan for three or four years and he just put out a new CD -- The Historical Conquests of Josh Ritter -- which I love. The show was amazing. His enthusiasm and energy were infectious. He had a huge smile on his face while he played and sang most of his songs. He commented a number of times on how "amazing" it was to be here playing for us.

I'm a creature of habit, as are most people, and I tend to enjoy songs as they're recorded on the album (do people still use that word?) more than when they're performed live. But Josh Ritter had the opposite effect. I've listened to his newest CD about ten times since we saw the concert and there are a number of songs I liked better live than on the CD. He's incredibly talented.

I have also taken to reading the lyrics while listening to the songs and they are really quite poetic. Here are a few examples of some of my favorite lines from different songs:

"Pity the bullet and pity the man Who both find their place in the same sad plan Who both are like the barrel going over the falls Crying all they way down I never asked to be involved."

"I traded all the innocence I ever had for hesitation."

"The crickets all leapt up and met the moon with a standing ovation."

"Oh Marie if you would stay then we could stick pins in the map Of all the places where you thought that love would be found But I would only need one pin to show where my heart's at In a top secret location three hundred feet under the ground."

There are a lot more from his other albums but I don't have the liner notes to those with me at the moment.

His music is inspired and has great sound, and it makes me love it even more knowing that Josh Ritter is an intelligent, intellectual guy who reads Thoreau and about the fall of the Roman empire on the tour bus.

I'm in Vermont with baby Doodle visiting my mom and I had to bring some Ritter to listen to (Animal Years, Hello Starling and the aforementioned new one) while I'm here -- I think the only CD my mother owns is The Sound of Music.

When we begged for an encore he didn't play games and take forever to come back on stage. He unplugged his guitar and stood away from the microphones and played Girl in the War to us. The whole show was incredible and unique. If you ever get a chance to see Josh Ritter live do it. Get a babysitter, cancel your other plans, bring your friends and just go. You won't regret it.

19 months old

Is it time for the monthly update already? The months are going by faster and faster as baby Doodle ages.

Baby Doodle's vocabulary continues to grow and amaze me. He identifies just about everything he sees by name and describes many things in two and three-word sentences. He also has learned that more than one of something means you add an s at the end of the word. Some examples of his speech: blue shoes, orange shirt, big truck (for tractor trailers), stinky truck (for the garbage truck), dirt digger (they're doing construction up the street), dog hat (see post below), all better (when I'm putting diaper cream in his butt), clean poop (when he actually wants me to change him), purple circle (from his shape sorter), triangle (he says it perfectly), hurt head (any time he bangs his head), blue jeans. You get the idea. He repeats EVERYTHING. He says, "train round round track choo choo." That's probably his longest sentence and he repeats it whenever he sees a train.

He can correctly identify a few shapes: circle, triangle, star, egg, square. And some colors: red, orange, blue, green, purple, grey and brown. He doesn't even attempt to say yellow, but his orange is pretty good. He knows a ton of animals and their sounds.

He has an incredible memory. We went to the zoo last weekend to trick-or-treat and one of the treats he received was a spider ring. Yesterday, he found the spider ring in his pumpkin and he said, "spider ring zoo." He has seen my brother six or seven times in his life including when he was born, yet we'll be walking down the street and see someone who looks very much like my brother and he'll say, Uncle Doodle (only he uses his real name). He remembers toys he's played with at other kids' houses and refers to them with the kid's name.

He has a slight cold now and blows his nose into the tissue when I hold it to his face. He doesn't complain about having his nose wiped. He asks to take naps after we finish lunch or if he's feeling especially tired. He asks to see his friends at various points throughout the day. Most days we see at least one of his friends. He says "cheese" when you hold the camera up but then he makes a face that isn't a smile. He scrunches his nose and raises his upper lip to show his teeth. It's not very attractive making the candid shots of him much better.

He continues to be more and more fun.

Halloween pictures

We had a great Halloween with baby Doodle. Though it was not his first, he actually participated and sort of understood what it's all about. We picked up Mr. Doodlebug at the train station at 12:47, which BD loved. Like most kids his age he is crazy for trains.

After baby Doodle's two and a half hour nap we got him dressed in his costume -- he was a dog -- and gave him his pumpkin in which to collect candy. Baby Doodle has been into pushing the stroller instead of riding in it so when I oblige him it takes us a long time to get where we're going. We went to the Fiendling's house, well really it's Girlfiend and Boyfiend's house, and hung out with them for a bit. Then we went trick-or-treating on their block and the two blocks leading to our house. By the fourth or fifth house baby Doodle was saying "tickateat" at the door with his pumpkin outstretched. He got lots of delicious candy only a portion of which he'll be aloud to eat (the plain chocolate).

I put him to bed at 7:30 and had a great time at our annual neighborhood party that we host. It seems to get bigger every year (this was the third time we've held it). And now for the pictures . . .

I was trying to upload a few pictures but blogger seems to be having technical difficulties. I'll try to update this post later today -- after gym class. Sorry Aunt S.D. and Grandma.

You can really see the tail in this one. I made the costume.