guilt ridden

After abandoning baby Doodle (at his grandparents' house) for four days so Mr. D and I could go to Key West for our friend's 40th birthday celebration I brought him to school today (his second day). He was acting up before we left. I asked him what was bothering him and why he was acting so badly. He said he didn't want to go to school. I assured him that it would be fun and his friend would be there and that I would pick him up after he ate his lunch. That seemed to help. He willingly got in the car and walked without hesitation to the school entrance. I brought him to his classroom where the same two kids were crying (same as last Tuesday). Baby Doodle seemed fine. I colored a little bit with him then went to the fabric store, framing store, bank and Hair Cuttery, where I got an awful haircut.

When I picked baby Doodle up his teacher said that he was pretty sad the whole time. He cried a lot, but participated in everything while on the verge of tears. It made me so sad to hear. I paid the next month's tuition today and am already regretting it. I don't know if I can torture him like that. I'm hoping that today was a bit unusual since we had just left him for a good chunk of time and that once we're in a more regular routine he won't mind being left at school for three hours.

I hope I'm doing the right thing by keeping him there another month and a half. I guess I'll see how things go and if he still hates it in October then we'll pull him out and he can stay home with me and be happy.

On his first day of school last week.